I think maybe I just forgot.
I forgot that running after a long day at work followed by a longer afternoon with my kid then making dinner then eating a full dinner will almost always result in a really bad (and short) run. Which is why every long(er) run I’ve had has been on a weekend morning.
I forgot that I get overwhelmed when I set my mileage goals too high. That when I try for three I can only run one, but if I go for one, I almost always do more. And when my goals are super low, my runs always feel awesome. Meeting goals totally rules. Even when they’re small.
I forgot that schedules are hard during the school year. I really shouldn’t expect to always be able to get my three runs in every week. And when I don’t find the time, I forgot that everything isn’t everything. There’s always next week.
I forget that walking is okay too. After an impossible run this weekend, I gave up and walked. I walked hard and did all the hills that I can run on. Walking counts. I don’t always have to run all the miles.
I forgot that I can always begin again. Each run is its own. I don’t have to carry the weight and struggle and disappointment or whatever else my head put into all of this into the next one. I can drop it. I can start over. Every time.
I forgot to go gently. I forgot to drink more water. I forgot that I’ve made incredible progress. I forgot that everyone gets discouraged. I forgot that everyone has a bad run. Or two. Or three. I forgot to pretend that the whole world is proud of me, because really, they are.
This week, I remember.
Hopefully I’ll still remember this on my next run. If I don’t, you’ll find me whining about it onTwitter and you can make me read this post again.